I keep finding myself debating what I should be doing and the debate is this: Is this God's will or Is this my will (aka settling for less than the best way or screwing up again)?
This internal debate got all stirred up (again) after a brief sermon by Dr. York on his non linear outline of the book of Phillipians, in which these four steps are repeated throughout the book (I'll be studying this in depth later tonight). They are (with apologies for any incorrectness; I forgot my notebook so my notes are few):
1. To understand that God has a purpose for your (my) life; the will of God isn't revealed in the circumstances but in the way I handle/respond to those circumstances.
2. God chooses the means to accomplish that purpose (His) in your (my) life.
3. You must respond correctly to the means God chooses to accomplish his purpose in your (my) life. This is where I have a choice, and affect the outcome.
4. Results are reaped based on my response. If you (I) don't respond correctly; you (I) don't get the blessing from God's treasure house (whether this is converts, good relationships, spouse, etc.).
Number three is what has me all freaked out, because I feel like so much time is being wasted. I'm also prone to boredom, so that affects things, too. I know I shouldn't be all anxious about it (Phillipians 1:6), but if you've hit rock bottom once, you have no desire to be back in that place again. Maybe I'm getting too comfortable, and wanting to stay put when I'm not meant to. Learning to be content in every situation doesn't necessarily mean that you are meant to stay in that situation.
I don't know. My lunch break is over and I'm still no closer to an answer than I was before....
....to be continued later, I guess.
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