I wish I had a good analogy for this. And for some reason, all I can think about is how much I love the sound of tree frogs. For me, they herald the coming of my favorite season, summer, and all that it involves: sleeping with the windows open, running around barefoot, shorts, sandals, my birthday and the county fairs. Not to mention the (mostly) clear night skies and the fact that I can sit outside comfortably and just watch the stars and absolutely lose myself in wonderment at the God who created it all.
You see, I haven’t been able to do any of those things beyond the occasional sneak a peek at the stars, except hearing the sounds of tree frogs. For some reason, they’ve been going nuts for about the last two weeks. The same amount of time that I have been under a very direct spiritual attack.
As you may or may not have read the bits and pieces in my blog, I’m nearly financially ruined and this has been robbing me of the excitement of my first international mission trip to the point that I nearly pulled out last week. Not only did it rob me of that, more importantly, it robbed me of the very close communication that I was having with God in Bible study and in getting deeper into my prayer life. By the time I began to realize what was going on, I had missed two Sunday services and two sessions of my Wednesday night Bible study group. And *I* wondered why God felt so distant and why the life that was getting better, was starting to fall apart.
I was making online friends, and talking to them about godly things but the truth is that I was starting to rely on one in particular to sort of be my confidant and encourager. I was falling into my old unhealthy relationship patterns of putting another individual before God and before myself. One of the verses that appeared in one of our first conversations was Psalm 37:4. In encouraging me, he was seeking to remind me that God loves us and he *will* give you the desires of your heart. Who doesn’t love to hear that? Anyway, my new friend is trying to work through some things, and I realized that I had lost my focus and maybe he did, too.
At about midnight, unable to sleep, I decided to journal some Bible verses from one the Bible studies I have been working on called A Woman Who Hurts A God Who Heals. At the end of each lesson, you are provided with several different scriptures and you can choose whichever is speaking to you and journal about it, meditate on it, etc. And then God decided to do one of his really cool God things: the next selection on the list was Psalm 37:3-6.
Right away verse 4 jumped out at me (I’d underlined it previously) but then the entire selection got my attention. God was saying, Hello, Leah!!! Do I have your attention now??? Trust in me, commit to me!! Why are you worrying over money and your ex husband and your new friends and the price of gasoline?? WHERE IS YOUR FAITH???
Ooops. I enjoy my relationship with God, why have I been neglecting it??!! I need to slow down and learn to be patient and see what the future brings. My focus needs to shift to how I can live for Christ today and in seeking the hidden blessing in the everyday things of life. I need to *live with God in the moment* and let HIM focus on putting the rest of my days together. As if that weren’t enough to get my attention, God spoke to me again through my one year devotional Bible. The devotion was about the safety of the old and how our fear keeps us from our desires. The last sentence said it best: He preferred the safety of the old to the adventure of the new.
It was only after reading and praying and meditating on these verses (a lot!) that I was able to reach out and help others by giving them some advice that I hope they will take to heart. And then I realized how much I enjoy helping others just by listening to their problems. Just in talking to them and hearing how their family members are. The most worthwhile part of my day at any given moment is when I’ve helped someone obtain some sort of peace of mind through something that God has led me to say. I don’t know what this means in regards to my future, but hey, God works in mysterious ways, Elwood.
Now about those tree frogs. Had I taken the time to live in the moment, I’d have been able to appreciate my favorite sound in the world and the Creator who knows how much I love to hear them sing. And they did; through the whole thing. I just wasn’t open to hearing it.
No comments:
Post a Comment